The well-meaning advice from strangers has haunted me as a mom. Especially when my kids were very small, these older women would stop me to say, “Cherish these years. One day, you will miss them so much.”
These warnings are the worst because parenting is so hard, especially parenting newborns and toddlers. It’s hard to cherish when you’re in fight or flight so often, and so frequently trying to find a potty for your desperate kid.
As Glennon Melton points out, young moms feel like they’re scaling Everest, working so hard at something noble and exhausting. It’s not helpful to have well-meaning people along the way yelling, “Enjoy this! Don’t just get through! ARE YOU NOTICING THE SCENERY?”
Here’s the good news: as your kids get older and more stable, when you’re not so busy keeping them from choking hazards and diaper rash, you relax a bit. You start to enjoy your kids as people.
I love seeing the miracle of our kids’ emerging personalities: Catie’s humor is sarcastic and sharp; Elisabeth’s work ethic is German in its tenacity; Sam loves to tease me; Nate can tell a story about school with alarming detail. Dinners with this crew are fun. I love the people our kids are becoming.
Last week, when a woman at church told me to enjoy these years, I looked her in the eye and say, “I am.”
This is the good news for parents of toddlers. True, your kids will never be this dependent on you again, but so much fun is right around the corner. You will get to witness them meeting their best friends and spouses and finding their careers and what makes them really laugh.
So, smile at the well-meaning strangers, tell they you are cherishing these moments, and know the best seasons are yet to come.
