Let me start by warning you that this post is packed with first-world problems. Really. If you’re dealing with any important, actual problems, go ahead and click away right now. Reading about my insignificant issues might make your head explode.
Anyway, I also want to start by saying I had tears in my eyes when I took that picture of Elisabeth. They were tears of joy because this moment, of showing kids the beach house for the first time, was so exciting and so happy.
The moment after that, when the kids opened the door and poured into the house to see it all, was also tears-of-joy fun and happy. The whole weekend was so happy.
Which makes me wonder…why can I NOT STOP CRYING?
See? First world problem.
But first-world problem or not, I can’t get over how emotionally raw I am this week.
Maybe it’s from the fatigue? After all, M and I are basically trying to open a tiny little hotel, in our free time–right smack-dab in the middle of the busiest season of our lives. No one ever says to us, “Y’all need a hobby!” And let me tell you, the house has some issues, so making it rental ready is definitely a hobby. So, it could be all the manual labor of throwing out ten years of someone else’s memories that’s making me cry.
Or, it could be my own long-lost memories. I grew up about five miles from where we bought this house. Like anyone’s childhood, mine was full of good and bed memories. But this weekend, with the heavy smell of saltwater in my nose and Laughing Gulls cawing in my ears, I felt like I was home again.
So, of course, I cried.
Or it could be the shock of beach life. The little neighborhood where our house is seems so peaceful. So quiet. Life moves so slowly there. The juxtaposition of beach life (most people’s daily agenda in this neighborhood is reading a book or jogging by the sea) and our real life (most people’s daily agenda there includes several sports practices, twelve hours of work, drive-thru dinners, and KEEPING UP WITH EVERYONE) is so different. The peace of beach time was a balm for my worn-out soul. A balm that, apparently, makes me cry like an idiot.
Or maybe these are all tears of joy. So many sweet friends came to visit us at the beach this weekend. They all said the same thing, “Y’all have wanted this for so long. We are so happy for you.” God is so good. When I look back on last year, when He healed me from a chronic illness, to this year, when we’re overwhelmed with the fun blessings He’s given us. He is so good, all the time. Typing that last line made me, you guessed it, cry.
For all these reasons, it was so hard to leave the beach. I took this last picture as the big kids, dogs, and me backed out of the driveway to head back to Katy. It was already late, and M and Nate would be even later since they were doing the final close-down of the house.
Watching sweet Nate get smaller and smaller as we drove away put a huge lump in my throat…
…which is now a bunch of tears that won’t go away.
