Easter Sunday was yesterday. This year, Easter was a huge relief.
Yes because we got to celebrate Jesus rising from the dead. But not only that. This year Easter also marked the end of a really hard Lent.
Lent wasn’t hard in the penitential, sacrificial sense. Lent was hard because the last six weeks have been a learning ground for me. I can mark it with the liturgical calendar. God packed difficult lessons into these past six weeks.
So, I’ll spare you the stories of how I learned all these lessons, but it does seem like a good idea to write down the net of what I learned during this hard season. Maybe for no other reason than that this might help seal these lessons in my stubborn, iron-clad, lesson-proof soul.
1. Lesson Learned: Let It Go.
Ilsa was on to something. For the past few weeks, I got sucked into some mama drama, realized some friendships aren’t worth fighting for, replayed hurtful conversations on a never-ending loop in my mind, and felt sorry for myself. Let me tell you, my inner psyche has been a JOYFUL PLACE TO BE. Except not. Finally, I started to pray and pray and pray. Thanks to Jesus and forgiveness, my white-knuckled grip on all these misunderstandings and grudges started to loosen a bit. More prayer, more forgiveness, more letting go. Repeat every day for lots of days until the prayer, forgiveness, and faith-strengthening all became a cycle. By the time Easter rolled around yesterday, the light was back in my worn-out soul.
2. Lesson Learned: No. (<— that’s a complete sentence).
During Lent this year? Wow. I found out the hard way that saying yes to Committees and Favors and Positions might just lead you to a place where you don’t recognize your own life. Welcome back, Old Life! Lent is over! The commitments have been fulfilled, the end is here! Now to remember that saying Yes to all those commitments doesn’t work. The grass is not greener under the busier. The busy people are just watering it all the time rather than living their actual lives.
3. Lesson Learned: Just a Grain of Sand.
During the (Lenten) season of Overcommitment and Hurt Feelings, I forgot this is not my story. God did not create me and say, “NOTHING is more important than your comfort, dear child. Complain bitterly if you feel at all mistreated. Be on the lookout for anyone not acting you like you think they should. Be cynical about those around you! Impatient with those on a different timeline than you! Make sure everyone likes you. Wear yourself out trying to please everyone because the WHOLE UNIVERSE IN HINGING ON YOUR STORY!”
Ha. Of course, God said the opposite. Over and over He said, “I’m telling a generation-long story here. Your thread is beautiful, but it is just one thread in My grand tapestry. You are living in symphony with my billions of other children. Be patient and so loving with My other fragile children. And if you make a mistake, no big deal. I can redeem anything. Look at all the fun surprises in your life, you silly girl.”
That’s the real net of what I learned this Lent: I’m just another grain of sand. The world is not resting on my shoulders. I can mess up or have fun or take risks loving other people or let the grudges go because this is all God’s super-amazing story. In the end, He’s got it all figured out anyway.
Happy Easter.
